Iva’s personal site - Squirrelism.net

I always give blank stares and shake my head in disbelief when people tell me how much they love summer. For me, it’s the worst season of the year. Heat, heat, heat, heat and more heat. I understand that it is perfectly bearable in countries where summer temperature is what we already have in May and what we have during the nights in June, July and August (if we’re lucky, that is); but I seriously don’t understand how someone can praise temperatures from 30 to 35, dangerous ultraviolet rays, sweaty and smelly people everywhere, way too many barely dressed young girls showing too much of their, very often unnaturally tanned bodies (redlight special: butt cracks peeping out of way-too-low cut clothes…eww) and way too many barely dressed old men showing too much of their bodily hair. Not to mention food defrosting, drinks getting warm after a couple of minutes, natural cosmetics rottening. Summer? Nooo, thanks. Only if I could spend it in some nice place outside, perhaps. But that would be too crowded. I don’t know. I don’t like summer and it’s a fact.

Actually, a temperature of 30-35 degrees Celsius would be acceptable right now. Why? Because the termomether on our balcony now says it’s forty five degrees. Weather reports say it’s 42, it was 43 earlier today and it definitely was 45 on Sunday, the day when Mira said it was 52 in her street.

Seeing that it’s 17 degrees in Ireland, 22 in England, France and Czech Republic and that the only worse countries in terms of temperature than us know are Iraq, United Arab Emirates Syria and Saudi Arabia, I don’t know what to think. Ummm…hello? This is Europe. It’s not a middle-east desert country, we have trees, rivers and all those nice things.

They say the sky will be particularly cloudy tomorrow, that there’s a chance of a rainshower as well. Temperature? Pure heaven compared to this: 16 degrees during the night and 29 degrees at the “worst” point during the day. They also say that many people might have health problems because of such a huge change. I’m going to have a health problem too: I’ll go hysteric from happiness if it happens.

And then people ask me why I’d move to Antartica…bleh.

This is for Sofija, she wanted me to update…and I am guessing she’s not aware that I have made another blog for Serbian/Croatian/Bosnian-speakers, it’s over there. Also, RHCP Serbia, run by Ivan, Jovana and I is finally up, for now just the forum, but we’ll get the rest up when we can.

First, one of my best friends and one of the most important people in my life sent me an angry mail yesterday afternoon. I wrote a long reply to explain who was screwing around with me, she replied back today, but I don’t dare to read it. I put the message in the read later folder. I am not mentally able to see what she will say. All I know is that, whatever I do, I need her in my life because she’s like family to me. God, this sucks. And I know that she knows I have no nerves but…still… I lost her once already. My heart and mind wouldn’t survive that.

I had a website crash which I managed to solve but it ended up with taking tranquilizers and my hands were shaking. I thought someone hacked me, I alarmed the hosting provider support and it turned out a database table just b0rked itself and needed to be repaired. I was so paranoid. I almost thought years of hard work blew up…so, I needed a walk…and more Pepsi…

…and then when I came back home with Pepsi, snacks and dad’s cigarettes, my wallet didn’t come home with me somehow, so I lost my ID, my health care ID, public transportation ID with the monthly ticket, bookstore three-year discount card, Elle shopping card and two debit cards, one youth Visa and one Maestro. There was also a tiny birthday card from a friend, a couple of paper calendars and proverbs we get with popcorn. And some money, about 20 Euros in dinars, but that’s the least important thing. Luckily, I blocked both cards and nobody knows my PINs anyway…but god…I don’t have documents.

If my life continues like this, I’ll die from a heart attack at 30. There’s been too much stress recently, everywhere. And in the end, come se tutto quello non bastasse, my camera is completely broke, I can’t even turn it on because it starts pulling its lense in and out as if it was epileptic. I wanted to take it to the service, but with my schedule these days, that turned out to be pretty impossible.

Recently, I’ve been on DeviantArt more than ever before and I’ve been neglecting the most of the online communities I’m visiting apart from the local Lush forum I’m the administrator of. Why? Work, work, work; followed by social life, social life, social life; ending with sleep, sleep, sleep.

Partly, I blame all this on the fears and traumas I’ve been through in 2005. and the most of 2006. Partly, I blame it on having been completely smitten and gaga for the past two months.

Shakira knows how to describe it properly. So, I’ll let her finish this entry for me…

Ojerosa, flaca, fea, desgreñada,
torpe, tonta, lenta, necia, desquiciada,
completamente descontrolada
tú te das cuenta y no me dices nada
ves que se me ha vuelto
la cabeza un nido
donde solamente tu tienes asilo
y no me escuchas lo que te digo
mira bien lo que vas a hacer conmigo

Wanted to write this yesterday, but I did not want people to think I’ve gone mad or played a 1st April prank on them.

OK, so…I am angry and disappointed with my friends. There are a couple of honourable exceptions, but everyone else SUCKS, more or less. They have huge egos, their word has to be the last word, they’re all dependent on someone or something and the most of them ignored what happened to my dad last Sunday and don’t think that something else that has been happening recently, something with a very very sad ending from my point of view, was a big deal.

That would be it.

I am serious. I don’t like some aspects of real, or, let’s be more precise, realistic life. This month I had more than a teaspoon of it, perhaps a whole soup spoon and I don’t think I enjoy it. Why? Because it brings me extreme nervouse, a fairly visible amount of anxiety, a strange need to eat more and sleep more and…blah, whatever I’m talking about, it’s not for me. Or, if it is, it was meant to happen sometime else, involving some other people. There was an evening this month I will always remember, as something that has never happened before, but after that day, everything went downhill. No damage was done to me physically, but mentally, I ‘ve been a-bombed. It’s not for your ears, mostly. I might explain my LiveJournal friends what did (not) happen and how DUMB I’m feeling at the moment. Doubt it will change.

On a happier note, the new RHCP video can be found online as it’s unfortunately not being aired here in Europe yet. I soo want a better quality version, as this is jaggedy. So, what you’re about to see is the band in ghetto and, as always, John is adorable. This was recorded in the second half of November 2006, I guess, as his hair was maybe only 1cm longer in Vienna in December (trust me, I was 1 metre away from the man!) and, well, I so did NOT expect him to play dice, jump rope, get a head massage and be slapped in the face by a woman..also, switching roles in the video is priceless.

[youtube]BdH987JJDYs[/youtube]

And check the comments on that video on YouTube, someone asked if that was Justin Timberlake playing guitar. Errrm, no way, Justin is not that charming, definitely not that emotional either and I doubt he could ever pull out REAL falsetto. Sorry to all you bubblegum-pop fans, but John Frusciante is two thousand light years away in front of Justin Timberlake.

There will be a little server move occuring here one of these days. Yes, again. And, before I was notified about this, I went on to check what’s up with my hostees and realised that a couple of them have moved or closed and that a guy who has not talked to me in more than a year is using the webspace that used to belong to his website as image hosting space. How charming, how very freakin’ charming. So, on this note I would like to thank people who did tell me they were leaving and to thank Marie, Felicia and Vera for being amazing hostees. Wherever I go, I’ll bring the three of you along with myself! And hosting shall be closed for everyone else, I believe.

Spring has arrived today, too. Today at 1 in the morning. For the last time on 21st March in Europe. Next year 21st March will be the second day of springs, but who knows where we’ll all be in 366 days time?

Back. I have things to explain to people, especially to one of my bosses. I so hope he will understand because, well, I adore my job and I don’t want to lose it less than two months after I got it!

-My internet wasn’t working properly for 2 weeks and my email wasn’t responding properly. I think it was a server change with my main ISP and sudden refusals of mails from other account…either that or I had a virus. Now it finally works, I didn’t lose my address book and stuff, but I am having problems with sound on my computer…every once in a while I get the following screen of death and then my sound is gone and unless I reboot, the computer is MUTE. Don’t ask me why I don’t reformat…I have so much work to do and it would take up too much time and, also, I have no idea where the CD with the soundcard drivers is.

-I have something too…I don’t know if it’s a virus, but ever since a small cold I had at the end of January, I’ve been having pain under my left shoulder. It hurts all the time, which is hard to believe, but it does! The most of the time it’s like pain in the bottom from injections…but my back is definitely not my bottom and I had no injections, so this is sick…dealing with constant back pain for three weeks. In the end, looks like I’ll have to go to the doctor and I hate doctors because lately they were just screwing up every single diagnosis.

I’ll post a decent entry tomorrow or something. Need to email a bunch of people and explain them what was happening!